Loving the things I never would have written

 

In January of 2020 our oldest son met a lovely girl from Chile. She came to the states to visit after finishing high school, and they happened to be in the same place at the same time. She came to the house a few times and we sensed she was going to be around for a while, but didn't know exactly what that would look like. When the pandemic hit, she went back to Chile, and then the borders closed. They continued a long distance relationship. 

On December 31, Tristan flew to Chile to meet Krishna's family. What was meant to be a 2-week trip turned into a 3 month stay where they became engaged. Because of uncertainties and unknowns about the immigration process they decided to go ahead and marry while Tristan was still there. Our passports were unfortunately expired, and we did not feel that asking them to delay marriage for us was what they needed. We encouraged them to go ahead and marry without us if that is what they desired to do. 

On a Monday morning at 8:30am (6:30am our time) they showed up at the Chilean Justice of the Peace and officially became husband and wife. I laid in bed that morning with a mixed bag of emotions. I felt so thankful for what this new marriage meant for our son and for our family. I equally felt a sense of loss and sadness that I was not there.

Laying in bed while Tristan got married was not what I expected I would be doing on his wedding day. It would have never been in the script if I were the one writing it, but I have come to accept the fact that I am simply not the writer and this is not my story. I am in it. I have an important part to play, but it is not my story.

Sometimes, the things we would never write become the things we would never change. It is also possible to begin to love them. Now, news of a little baby boy to be born in Chile this fall brings me so much joy. I'm going to be a grandmother, and I'm not even 45 yet. I couldn't have written this. My imagination couldn't dream this up. I would never change it. 

I am so glad I'm not the writer.

Much love, XO!